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I grew up feeling awkward about my body and truth be told – my mother made me feel ugly about myself and my plumpness ever since I was a teenager. No boys took interest in me – that geeky fat girl. My Chinese Dance instructor called me the “Little Fatty” or 小胖子. My ex-boyfriend called me Fatty too, although in a more affectionate way. Perhaps he was ok with my size, but after he cheated on me twice with younger, slimmer, dressier chicks… I started to think otherwise.

I dressed like an auntie in my early 20s. I hid my boobs under loose fitting T-shirts, whereas those thunder thighs never saw the light of day under those baggy jeans. I was always in short sleeve tops or tops with 3/4 length sleeves in dark colours. I wore black-rimmed glasses as a form of arty identity from my design school background. Those were the dark days of my dressing.

Then I lost weight, quite a bit of those weight. Suddenly sleeveless dresses and spaghetti tops looked appealing on me. So much more options! Colourful clothes became interesting and flattering, thanks to my fair complexion. Even after I piled those weight back on a couple years later, I never shied away from sun dresses and sleeveless outfits again. So what if I showcased my flabby underarms? I’d tasted freedom in fashion and would never go back to wearing dull, boring clothes again.

But I didn’t have a “look”. Some girls look great in smart, executive outfits; some look great in ultra feminine floral dresses; some were hip fashionistas who look good in everything, even in outlandish clothes… but what was I?

Then I found some really cute dresses from ASOS sometime last year (yes you all buy from there, I know… I’m a laggard when it comes to dressing up) that FIT. I am a big UK14, so what? I rocked those dresses. No more sad “I’m sorry these are Free Size” crap. And these dresses were made of good quality fabric and flattered me in every way.

I may not be the girl with the great figure, but I have to admit – I am the girl that looked great in the gorgeous dress and not let the dress overwhelm me. So I set aside 4 dresses this Chinese New Year… they were all gorgeous, but this one is my favourite.

Love the bold colour stripes, skater cutting and vintage styling

Finally a vintage-looking dress that didn’t make me look frumpy! It didn’t cost a bomb either. I love this so much. The other dress was a floaty piece which may not entirely be right for me.

Cute, flattering and unique

And this one was worn to a friend’s wedding lunch late 2011 and apart from the revealingness of it all… it is in a really pretty shade of nude that really flatters my skin tone. I also had fun styling my hair and matching my make up to the outfit… and to complete it with a cute pair of shoes!

AIYOH! I want more dresses now! Especially now that I have found my “look”, I really want more dresses right now!!!

I’ve always found it difficult to grow my nails long all these years. That was until I started taking Fish Oil supplements on a regular basis. My nails have grown noticeably stronger and shinier. Without buffing they look healthy and pretty, not crumbly and dull anymore.

So I got a voucher for a mani-pedi session from my brother-in-law and his wife last birthday and thought this would a good opportunity for me to do a French Manicure for once! My nails were never long enough for it because I’m really not used to the length, so I guess the time has come for me to do this!

I’m not a manicure person, because I dislike having stuff stuck on my nails. It gets uncomfortable, so fake nails and extensions are definitely a big no-no. Being very unladylike, the pretty nail jobs always end up ruined after a few days. So it’s always been kind of a waste of money for me to do it. I can count with my 2 hands the number of times I’ve actually paid for a manicure.

Pedicures, on the other hand, are a little more value for money for me. For one they last longer and the foot scrub is always a good thing for my tortured feet.

I like French Manicures because it is simple and goes with any outfit. Will post photos

UPDATE:
Bad news. I broke one of my nails accidentally so I guess no more French Manicure I’m not keen on extensions leh.

But other than that, I’ve let my diet gone amok. Plans fell apart one after another even though they were simple and achievable. Stuff like “stop eating deep fried food” got thrown out after I got a waft of those darn McDonald’s fries. Even stuff like “drink only plain water” fell flat. How to cut down on carbs, you tell me?

I was about 68kg back in late 2009, dropped to 58kg late 2010 and without weighing myself, I can safely say I am somewhere around 63-65kg now. That’s a whole blah and a disappointment. To think I was just 3kg away from my target weight of 55kg! I’ve long since given up the aim of being 50kg again because I’m just not motivated enough. With this recent shrinking due to my awful appetite after the wisdom teeth surgery, I guess it’s time to regain my center… and start moving again.

Starting next week would be my weekly dancercise lessons and I’ve since kickstarted my cycling regime on NYE. I’ve got to keep this up! Diet-wise… I’ll start doing my Yong Tau Foo (no deep fried tau pok and less sauce!) – fish porridge – more veggies, less rice plan on weekdays. Just like how I did it back in 2009 when doctor advised me to go lose some weight so that my hormones can settle down and for my triglycerides level to go back down.

Exercise and healthy living has to be the goal of 2012. 55kg I will see you soon. I hope. I did it before and I will do it again.

We’ve always known that we would eventually have another cat after Gravy, just not that soon. Jeffwee always loved point cats and cats of this colour were almost always pedigree. I was adamant on not buying any of our future cats after I got involved with Cat Welfare Society because I became aware that there are just so many kitties out there without a home. Cookie was going to be the one and only cat that was purchased from a dingy pet shop. Never again. So there was a conundrum with no real solution.

After my final assignment early December, a friend of mine asked me if I would like to foster a rescued kitty which I agreed to. It’s the right timing because before my studies ended, I did not dare commit to anything extracurricular for fear of stretching myself too far. She was found dirty and scrawny from severe malnutrition, probably neglected and subsequently abandoned. We’d successfully fostered an Orange boy earlier in the year and nursed him back to health so I guess we were pretty ok fosters.

To our surprise, she is really pretty and cute. Jeffwee was instantly in love, even though she had some behavioral issues and poopoo problems and was really stinky from dried poop caking up her fur. We did not expect to adopt her as our own, really. But she was really sweet with a little squeaky meow.

We tried introducing her to our cats to see if they’d take to her… if she was aggressive and fierce towards them, then we wouldn’t keep her but work towards adopting her out to someone else suitable. But she was docile and submissive towards their unfriendly taunts and rude pawings… so I guess there was hope.

Then we figured out a name for her, Mochi… and the decision was set.

Hello, Mochi

I have nothing to complain about, really. My family had patched itself up and the relationship with my husband still solid as ever… All is good.

Looking forward to 2012′s Formula 1 season and our Europe trip in April!

I hope 2012 will be kinder to me as well!

Somewhere Over The Rainbow by Israel “IZ” Kamakawiwo’ole

This is one cover that I love very much. But the original is really lovely too.

Somewhere Over The Rainbow by Judy Garland

Rediscovered this after catching The Muppets movie yesterday morning.

The Rainbow Connection by Kermit The Frog

Another oldie but goodie.

Everyday Once More by The Carpenters

This is for the non-believer me.

Imagine by John Lennon

All oldies huh. Haha. A sure sign of me getting really old.

I’ve never felt so awful about eating… every bite and attempt to chew ended up with me wincing. Sometimes I’ll stop eating, even when I didn’t feel full, just because I got so tired of nibbling at everything and having to “chew” with my front teeth.

I went to my department’s Christmas Party on Friday night and I couldn’t eat properly and drink any alcohol at all. My colleagues were very nice and understanding about it, but looking at the free flow booze at the open bar last night, I felt really shitty. Really, bloody shitty.

And Saturday was filled with activities right from 6:30am. We had to get to a friend’s place to video their ROM ceremony and preparations way beforehand. It was a long day…

AND DID I MENTION THAT I DREAD EATING NOW!?!?!? Eating is a chore and I am frankly quite unhappy and feeling really impatient for my gums to fully heal over.

ARGH!!! When can I get well!?

P/S My husband was really nice, he was willing to drive all over the place to get me yummy food so I would feel a little less miserable. And while I was knocked out during the afternoon nap, he did all the housework by himself… and only waking me up after everything was done. Thank you, Jeffwee…

P/S/S?S?S?S?S Merry Christmas, everyone!

Some have asked why I have chosen this period of time to do such a surgical procedure, especially with all the social activities and bingeing sessions going on… I’d have to be honest here – I’m a little tired of work and I needed time out. My annual leave for the financial year has been allocated for my Europe trip in April and there isn’t much to play with anymore.

Plus the last dental check up I did revealed that my 4 wisdom teeth were indeed impacting my molars and will become problematic sooner or later… I’d finished up my year’s work for F1 amongst others and I desperately needed a break away from the office. It has been a deeply stressful year for me due to juggling the amount of schoolwork this entire year… and I am awfully exhausted.

To colleagues and possibly even bosses reading this – this was not some dodgy move that I pulled so that I could skip work. I’d planned ahead and informed you guys like a conscientious, responsible employee and I’d finished all my work up in time and in good standing, didn’t I? So this was it. The timing of this surgical procedure was set right after my final, major assignment. A week away from the office, just before the Christmas long weekend.

After a really challenging 2011, I needed to uproot (Get the pun? Geddit? Geddit?) a little and needed time off to reboot. Please give me that. Please.

Anyway, it’s too late to say no. My face is swollen and painful… so yeah! I have my MC and I will adhere to it.

I am still swollen though.

Ugh. I look awful. But oh well, this is expected of the surgery.

I have been eating porridge and ice cream and downing lots of cold drinks to soothe the jaws, but the effects didn’t last very long. I miss being painless. Argh.

For now I’ll continue hugging the cold compress to my face and moan.

Bleah.